Lily Tomlin
"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. "
"Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them. "
"No matter how cynical you get, it is impossible to keep up. "
"Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs. "
"Reality is nothing but a collective hunch. "
"Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world. "
"The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. "
"We're all in this alone. "
"Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet "